#100happydays

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Remembering the first day I joined this challenge, I was too anxious about it. Mainly because it’s my first time to do a challenge whole heartedly and with a dedication. It was the #100happydays challenge. My best friend was the one who introduced this challenge to me and she didn’t actually continued it. But I did. I wanted to make a point showing that I could finish that challenge no matter what! Last Thursday, May 29, 2014, I have finished the challenge. It gave me alot of pressure of how I’m going to finish this challenge. But hey, it was unexpected! I was worried that I might spend this day only at home because I didn’t want to be a loser and personally, I want my 100th day to be extra special and really happy. And so it was. With the help of God, He was so amazing and granted my wish. I thank Him for that.

I spent my last day of this challenge at Makati by eating at a buffet. The restaurant was called Dad’s and it was my second time eating there. It was HEAVEN! My brothers and I thought of heaven when we came in. Our feelings wouldn’t stop that time. We all felt like getting every food that’s in there right now because it was definitely mouth watering! I actually couldn’t think of anything to post in here and thankfully, I thought of this. I wanted to show everyone that a simple girl like me, who’s VERY, VERY lazy could finish a simple challenge like this. It might be simple but really hard to accomplish! Time and wifi is your enemy in this challenge. You really need to be smart on how you’ll handle these things. I never really imagined I’d reach this! But look at me now, I’m all proud because I finished this challenge with the help of so many people! :)

You will only get to finish this if you have some determination in you!

Get Over It!

Experiencing a heartbreak right now? Well that’s not a problem because I have 8 steps that could help you get over a heartbreak! I’m not ensuring you that it’s an easy process but it definitely help you get through it. “Heartbreak hurts, and there’s no denying it. Everyone will find a different way to get over it, but we all find being dumped or losing a loved one very hard. Easier for some people, but harder for others.” 

Here are 8 steps how to get over Heartbreak (http://www.wikihow.com/Get-Over-Heartbreak):

Step 1: Don’t be embarrassed to cry.

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You’ve been hurt–expect tears coming. You can’t just simply say you’re okay or fine when clearly, you’re not because acting “tough” will hurt yourself more. Crying doesn’t mean your weak, it’s just your way expressing you’re badly hurt and you can’t handle it anymore. If you you bottle up your feelings, you’ll only end up making yourself feel worse later. Let everything loose and don’t hold back anything.

Step 2: Find something to help take your mind off your heartbreak for a while, the feelings will pass with time.

 

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Make yourself busy. Look for activities that would get your attention to let your focus out of your heartbreak. The process would be easy if you find yourself an activity to focus on. I assure you that it would definitely make you feel free and happy! You’ll even forget about the heartbreak.

Step 3: Talk to your friends and family.

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Keeping all your feelings by yourself wouldn’t help you get through it. That’s why you have friends and of course, your family to help you out. Not everyone has a say about your current situation but at least they’re there to listen. Knowing that they’re lending their ears to hear you out is already enough. Letting you burst out on them would make you feel better. It would lessen the heavy feeling in your heart. A good friend you trust is a good friend to talk to.

Step 4: Focus on moving on.

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That’s one of the things you should keep in your mind. Focus yourself with other things such as your career, family, and other things you do every day. If you help someone else out, you’ll feel good, and have a chance to take your mind off the pain. This step is good for you after letting go of your tears. It’s time for you to get up on your feet and start moving! Staying in bed, watching netflix while eating a bucket of ice cream while crying won’t work. Remember: Good times are great way to help you get over a heartbreak.

Step 5: Keep it in Perspective!

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Think of the positive things in life. If you keep thinking about the negative things, then it’s no use. You’ll make yourself feel horrible and it’ll hurt. you. more. Keep thinking about the positive things in your life and what you have left. Just because you had a heartbreak doesn’t mean the whole world is against you! Think about what you can do with your future, and don’t let your loss destroy the rest of you life too. It’s not the end yet! Letting the feeling overcome you will lead you down a road that isn’t too pleasant. 

Step 6: Rebuild your life.

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Get the key to your past and lock it. Throw it away to a place you can’t see anymore! Get engrossed in new things, and try not to look back on the past. As what Jasmine Villegas say, “Never Look Back”. The more you move forward, the less it will hurt. Keep yourself occupied, so you don’t have the time to be upset. Keep moving forward, love! It’s never too late to find true happiness! 

Step 7: Talk to a professional

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This isn’t necessary actually. This is for the people who are really, really, really devastated after their heartbreak and they seem like there’s no good tomorrow for them. This is for the people who’s grief is to destroy their life. If this is you, seek a psychologist fast! A professional care would help you go through this by talking things out. They can almost give you good advice to keep your lost mind back in track. Honey, destroying your life wouldn’t work as well. It’ll only get worse!

Step 8: Accept it!

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You might never quite be happy about the event that caused your heartbreak, and you might always shed a tear thinking about it, but eventually you will find that you can live without it getting in the way. The damage has been done so accept it. It’s either things will go back to normal with you and the person who have caused the heartbreak or other possible results. Just remember: Every relationship is a learning experience, and every learning experience will positively affect your future. Time heals all wounds, especially in the case of heartbreak. Always remember that because it’s the end yet. Some of the painful things we encounter would make a great lesson for us to use in the future.

 

So there you have it everyone! The 8 steps how to overcome a heartbreak. It’s not easy as pie but it definitely help you out! Remember, it takes time for everything. You can’t rush things just to make yourself better. I’ve been through it alot of times and here I am, talking about it and telling you these steps are effective! Ending your life isn’t a solution. It won’t end anything.

Credits to: http://www.wikihow.com/Get-Over-Heartbreak :)

A thing about me

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Writing. I love writing. I’ve always dreamed of having my own book because of writing. People thinks that I’m free spirited–which is true–but they don’t know the other side of me. I love writing and it deepens my vocabulary and thinking. It is the side where I can freely express myself and thoughts. Just like this one, I love blogging to death. But the writing I’m talking about right now, is the one where you make stories. I’m more on fictional stories because that’s my fave genre to read. Believe it or not, that is what I do during my free time. They think I only do Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr… but what they don’t know is that I make stories. I make stories that lives inside my head and I put it into my word document. I have so many stories and ideas in mind and that’s why my imaginations go wild.

Most people around me thinks that I’m a shallow type person. Where I make fun of everything like everything seems funny and all. But no, I am not like that. I may seem shallow but deep inside, there’s so much in me that they do not know. Stories that I wish it came true to my life, stories that one day it would be one of the #1 best-selling novel in the world… and many more are my dreams and goals in life. I have infinity dreams I couldn’t count. 

xx

Fangirl Heart

Lately, I’ve been obsessing with this korean drama called, “My girlfriend is a gumiho”. At first I had no idea I’d get attached to it, but boy I was wrong! My fangirl heart has been tortured for days now because every episode of that show is so beautiful and you would love it! I don’t know if you love cheesy things but I do. Maybe that’s the reason why I loved it. But I’m not the only one who’s obsessed with it, we’re alot! The story line is so nice and if you haven’t spoiled yourself by reading the summary or plot online and watched it all the way, you’d be so anxious to finish it because it has so many twists and turns. Really, my fangirl heart has been dying a lot lately because I couldn’t stop fangirling! I love this part where they first became ‘friends’!

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I swear, I love this show with all my heart. The lead girl who plays as the gumiho is so beautiful and cute as well! Ugh basically she’s perfect and they guy is perfect too. I want them to be a couple in real life but then they aren’t because Shin Min Ah (the lead girl) is pretty much busy and the guy, Lee Seung Gi has a girlfriend already. My heart really broke but I’m recovering from it. It’s okay, they’ll be together in our hearts especially their the famous ‘Hoi Couple’! :) I don’t know what to do anymore because it’s been days and I haven’t moved on from it yet. Couldn’t shut up about this show! 

This post is about a fangirl who’s currently obsessing with something or someone. I don’t know if you could relate to this but this is basically how a fangirl fangirls. I don’t really know if you understood what I just said but really, this show totally hit my everythings. Especially their quotable lines! Ugh you’ll really love it. <3

Expectations vs Reality

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Is there a difference between Expectations and Reality? Well, let me tell you that there is a HUGE difference between those two. If you go around social network–especially on twitter–you will see tweets like ‘Reality sucks’… etc. It’s true but not most of the time. We tend to expect so much on many things and that causes us the pain. Expecting too much or even setting our expectations high hurts. I see people tweeting or saying ‘Once again, my expectations has failed me’. Well that’s sad, isn’t it? Yes it is because we expected. Too much. Not only love will kill you, but also expectations because once the reality kicks in, and your expectations is nowhere to be found, an arrow will hit you straight into your heart and soul. You know what I mean

Reality for me sometimes sucks because not all in reality is beautiful. It’s not that my expectations are high, it’s just that I liked my expectations better. As what the picture above illustrates, the arrow is straight while in reality, it’s tangled up. Why? Here’s my explanation:

Expectations is much more easy than reality because in reality, you have to go through many things before you could reach your goals, dreams, or anything that you want. Like in other words, our expectations are the ‘easy way’ or simply a ‘shortcut’. I mean we could do anything with our expectations because it’s mostly in our head. But then again, it depends if reality would allow those things to happen. Not everything that we expect, happens. We should always remember that. It’s also a reminder for myself. Reality isn’t that bad. It’s just… hard to deal with sometimes. But you’ll learn to love it someday. 

But hey, I have my favorite saying that goes… ‘Expect the unexpected’. I will always love that saying because when it happens to me (in a good way), my whole day–somehow–would be complete! It happens to me mostly in my love life. Well, just mostly. But you know, the whole point is that expecting about something is also nice. It also has happy results, like that. Let’s not be negative about expectations because I see most people hatin’ on expectations. I know it sucks but, that’s life. We’ve got nothing to do about it. Reality is just being reality. Again, we can’t do anything about it as well. We just have to accept things, that it happened. That our expectations didn’t happen because reality didn’t approve it. 

Why am I saying all this? If you think I’ve experienced this, well you’re correct. But if you think this is just because I’m bored or anything like that… well you’re wrong. I wouldn’t take time writing all my posts if I didn’t experience it. I’m writing this because I want you to know that you are not alone. Someone, somewhere is also experiencing the same thing you’re having right now. So keep that in mind.

Always remember

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Pills? Cutting? Hanging yourself? Drowning yourself in tub? Those aren’t the best solutions to end all the problems in the world. Doing such things reveals that you are weak. But honey, ending your life isn’t the solution. I, personally have been experiencing problems lately and it wasn’t easy at all handling them. I’ve been having suicidal thoughts and I keep blaming myself for everything. I keep saying things like, “Fuck myself for existing”, “Why am I so ugly?”, “Why can’t I be her?”, “Why did I do this, that…” Questions like “Why and what”. But I didn’t tolerate those thoughts because I know, it won’t help at all and it won’t change anything.

You’re stronger than this. Always remember that. Ending your life isn’t the solution for everything. Keep thinking about the positive things in life because there is always hope. If you keep blaming yourself about everything, then that would lead you to suicidal thoughts. Having negative thoughts will cause you overthinking and overthinking will confuse your mind and everything that would lead you to one thing. So always remember that you are important. That you are better than this. That you are something. You are worth it. I’m saying these things because it also help me from saying bad things to myself. Because I needed to remind myself that I was created for a purpose and you, too. 

Be positive always. Keep thinking there’s hope. You are better and stronger than this.

Virtuoso

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“The secret of becoming a writer

is to write, write and keep on writing.”

- Ken Maclead

Do I agree to what Ken Maclead said about becoming a writer? Why yes I do! How can you be a writer if you don’t write? Common sense. But to write something meaningful and deep is another story. A quote by Virgina Woolf, “Every secret of writer’s soul, every experience of his life, every quality of his mind is written large in his works” struck me through my flesh. It’s not the painful one, alright. It’s the kind of struck that empowered me, as a frustrated writer to keep on writing more poems and all that. But where did all these things started? Let’s go back a little. Shall we?

This whole madness started when our Literature prof. told us to compose a poem about Love. We could only use metaphor, those poems where you disregard the usage of “like”. Instead of saying, “Love is like a wind”, you say “Love is a wind” etc. It was a big problem for me that time. I wasn’t a fan of writing poems like that. Ever since in High school, I hated writing poems because deep words hated me. I feel like every poet in this world reads the whole dictionary because of their soulful and soothing words that could make your spine tingle a little. I gotta admit that I was really paranoid–at first–but it all went away after the project making day. 

There were 5 choices. I chose the last one: compose a poem. There was no any specific topic at all so I chose Him. Why not write a poem about him? He’s always in my mind so why not, right? The poem started about me telling how he shines brighter than the headlights at midnight and continues to praise him by telling beautiful things about his smile that would make me breathe harder. Deep words aren’t my thing at all! Every time I see an unfamiliar words, I go “Woah there! Too deep” etc. But right after this whole thing, I came to realize I love these kind of stuff. I am now fond of it. The last lines of my poem about him went like this:

He will be my favorite 2am

Even if I’m not his

But who is my favorite scar of all scars?

It would be him.

I know it’s kind of weird but it has some meaning to me that I won’t expand anymore. But really, making poems–rhyming or not–has been my current habit. I wish it would never go away. I love this side of me. I get to express the deep things inside me, the things people would be surprised, shocked, stunned, astonish… I would love to let the people discover this side of me. Not just being the loudest one in class. I would want them to know that I am not just that, that I could bring out something in me that you will never expect.

Writing poems, especially for him, has been fun. And hopefully, it would last forever. There’s this quote I love about writing. It goes, “No one can tell your story so tell it yourself. No one can write your story so write it yourself”. The quote is true. No one can write your story but you. How could people write a story about you when they barely know anything about you write? But anyway, I can tell you that I am really inspired right now. Virtuoso, meaning you’re inspired. 

How ’bout you? Are you inspired? Write something! Who knows, you could be like Lang Leav and all the other amazing poets out there! You’ll never know, you could publish a book about your literary works. 

Which one?

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Confused, puzzled. I don’t know which one to choose. Heart or head? Honestly speaking, I am confused on which one to follow. The famous line goes “The heart says go, but my head says no”. You know things like that happens to me and I thought people overreact about it only. It’s really hard to decided which one you should follow because of the pros and cons that comes into your head while you’re reflecting about it. Other people say follow your heart because, it’s the heart. They say that even though it’s in the left, it’s still right. Things like that but other say, you should follow your head. God placed your head/brain on top for a purpose. But, which one should we really follow?

Why follow the heart? I looked around the net and all the social medias on why we should follow our hearts. Here are some of the reasons I found:

  1. Follow your heart because if you always trust your mind, you’ll always act on logic and logic doesn’t lead to happiness.
  2. If you don’t follow your heart, you will spend the rest of your life regretting.
  3. If you don’t follow your heart, you might spend the rest of your life you wish, you had.
  4. Listen to your heart because it harbors sacred things.
  5. Follow your heart, regardless of what others tell you to do. It’s how you feel at the end of the day that matters.

To sum things up, they say that we should follow our heart because it’s what we feel that matters. But when it comes to following your mind, there were few results only. It was mainly, “Follow your heart but take your brain with you.” So basically we all have to follow our hearts but never forget to take our brain with us. Why? Because we need both of them. It’s hard to follow between those two. Sometimes we follow what our emotions tell us and we become careless all of a sudden which is wrong. That’s why let us take our mind with us so we would make the right decisions in life. Not the careless ones and the spontaneous, whichever that pops in our head. Some things are worth thinking for. 

Just a reminder, follow your heart! But take your brain with you. Always.

What is this madness?

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I go around places and see pretty girls walking pass by me. Some are okay, some are fine but some are just so beautiful you have to stop and stare at them for a while. Well, that’s me. I am always like that especially when I’m at the mall and I see this beautiful girl walking towards me and as soon as she passed by, I turn around and stare at her for a while with a sigh–which means I wish I was like her or something better than her. Thoughts like that play inside my head. 

Every time, whenever I take time reflecting about my life and all the other things, I get annoyed with myself. I always ask myself, “What is this madness?” or “What is going on with your head right now?” Why? Well because I am insecure. Insecure about many things in life. Like, I want to be her. I want to be like her. Maybe because I still don’t have the love I’m looking for? I don’t know. I have so many answers in my head. Every time I think about my insecurities, I become emotional. So emotional to the point of saying weird things. Ugly things coming out from my mouth which I regret saying at the end of the day. 

Why am I posting about this? Well right now, I am insecure in so many ways. Maybe because the apple of my eye at the moment is being surrounded by so many girls and I am not being noticed. I followed him on Twitter months ago but no follow back. My best friend followed him and at the same night, he followed her back. Am I really that unattractive? I ask myself. ALWAYS. It’s always him. The reason why I post weird things. Weird things about myself that I don’t even know why I’m talking about. 

On the brighter side, I tell myself always, by the end of the day, that being insecure isn’t nice at all. I keep thinking that if I go and be insecure of others, it means I’m hating what God has given me. What God has blessed me. And I don’t want to be like that, thinking that I am hating what God has given me. I am thankful in so many ways that He created me this way. But those insecurities that I feel just happens whenever I am jealous or paranoid. I just need to keep myself busy so I would stop being insecure. Those girls I see on Tumblr and other sites, I should just ignore them. And you should too, guys. It’s not healthy. Being insecure? No, that’s not a good thing AT ALL. I am personally telling you, that stop being insecure. Stop those insecurities in life because at the end of the day you’re the one who’s going to get hurt. 

Be satisfied and happy of what we have. God created us like this for a purpose. If we still don’t know what that purpose is, then let’s wait. Let’s be satisfied of what we have because hating ourselves means hating what God has done to us. And we don’t want to hurt God’s feelings right?

What breaks your heart apart

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He makes me happy. Even in the simplest ways, he still do. Those hi, hello’s and how are you’s, those are the simplest things that could already brighten my day. But the sad fact there is, we barely talk. We are not in the same college or building and so it means I’ve got 0% chance of talking to him. He and I are basically just acquaintance. Deep inside, I don’t want to accept the truth because I have feelings for him and it won’t go away. I tried to push it away but it’s still there. Right now, I am looking for a reason for me to give up and to move on because obviously, this isn’t going to work. He’s far away from me and he’s head over heels for this girl–who’s by the way taken. But even though he stops liking her, he has a very close friend that he could be with. I’m pretty sure they’ve known each other way before college started so I guess I have nothing compared to her. Funny because I am acting this way. I think it’s because even if I know there’s no more chance, a little spark of hope is still there. 

Other people make him happy. He makes me happy but I can’t make him. He finds his happiness with someone else and it’s really sad because I want him to know that I could also make him happy. I try. I always try. I always look for a way to lighten up his mood whenever he’s down and depressed. It might not be directly, but indirectly like through his blog. You know it actually breaks my heart knowing that I am hoping so much and he’s hoping for another one.

It’s so messed up. i don’t even know why I’m making this post. Maybe it’s the emotion that’s driving me crazy right now. Yeah, I guess it’s all the emotion. I can’t help it. Every day, I hope that he would notice me and consider me too. But I guess it’s a no and I’ve gotta stop. It totally breaks my heart. *Sigh